In this day and age, being aware of your child's social media presence is of increasing importance. Before allowing your child accounts on various social media sites, be aware of the terms and conditions or usage of those sites. There are certain age restrictions on apps and websites that users are not always aware of. There are reasons for these restrictions. My children were allowed to use AIM back in the day but they were in the office where I was able to check on who they were communicating with.
With cell phones and tablets being in almost every child's hand these days, they may find themselves on various social media sites of which you are unaware. Speak with them about what kind of pictures they are posting and who may be seeing those pictures.
We all have heard the stories about young children that are hooked into communicating with adults that are pretending to be a child or teen. Especially children that spend a great deal of time alone.
There are certain sites like Facebook in which everyone uses their name and those are relatively safer, but on Instagram you do not necessarily know who may be following you and viewing your posts and pictures.
Your children should be aware that you are monitoring their posts and you should share conversations about what is acceptable to post and what is not acceptable. They should be aware of the ramifications of what they are saying or displaying in pictures on these sites.
Your children should be aware of the dangers of posting their address, cell phone number, location, school, or if they are alone often. They should also make sure they are dressed appropriately if sending out a picture of themselves.
The following examples were brought to my attention by several teens that I know:
-Negative posts about teachers.
-Videos taken while driving a vehicle.
-Naked babysitting children in a bathtub which is considered child pornography.
-Posts involving underage drinking.
-Posts making fun of another patron somewhere that the person posting does not even know.
-Posting themselves in bikini's or undergarments (which also could fall under the category of child pornography.)
-Bullying posts of classmates or team members.
-Stating of location while with other children and not an adult.
-Girls sending pictures of themselves in bras because they were pressured into it by boys
-Making up fake posts under a teachers name.
Make sure that you are giving them some ground rules. These ground rules are the non-negotiable rules such as indicating their location or giving out their cell phone number. Making Facebook closed unless accepted by you or them. Allow them to help make the rules, build trust and know that they understand why these rules are being put in place. Let them know that you love them and want to keep them safe and tell them that media can still be a fun past time even with these safety measures in place. Please do not just allow them the password or your credit card for indiscriminate usage.
It really should not be necessary for you to stalk your child's posts. The ground rules you make together and the conversations regarding what is and is not appropriate should set the tone. If you should discover inappropriate posts after you have set the rules, make sure there are connected consequences for their actions. Take their tablet, their phone, or laptop. Set up parental controls. Make sure they take responsibility for their actions.
Due to my lengthy conversations with my children while using AIM and since then other social media, I was able to trust their judgement and we built trust over time that they were using these items properly. One of my most important ground rules was to never type or post a picture of anything that you wouldn't allow anyone to either read or see. It really made them think about the posts they decided to share.
Social media is not going away. There are definite concerns regarding the appropriateness of their posts and pictures. Please make sure that you are monitoring what your children are doing on apps and social sites. They should be aware that you are keeping an eye on what they are doing. Make sure that you have the conversations prior to their having regrets about something that they have posted.
I want to thank my daughter for the idea, information, and collaboration on this post!
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